As a new year start it is customary in western culture to reflect on the past year, be grateful for yet another year alive on this earth and take the nearly mandatory new year resolution.
2019 was crazy for us with a lot of stress both at home and at work. Some of this was self-induce as we could have taken on less personal projects, other stressors were externals like my company’s decision to cut the headcount in my department by 50%. On the outside, the year was a success as we managed to complete all our set tasks before the year ended but this came at a huge personal cost which makes me wonder if it was all worth it. Since we came back to Germany in December 2018, we worked every evening for at least two hours on improving our German or looking for apartment for sale, we spent nearly all our week-ends at German class, visiting flats all over the city or reading 60 pages long contracts in legal German and understanding mortgage conditions etc. It was exhausting! I am so tired and constantly on hedge that the slightest setbacks turns me into an angry monster or into a frail being crying out for meaningless mishaps. Things that I normally love like baking or decorating the house for Xmas felt like an obligation.
While I would love to believe that things will be quieter next year, with less personal projects and outside stressors, I don’t! Something will always come up, because shit happens to us and the one we love, I have ambition for my life and always find new endeavor to grow. So my goals for this year is to sustainably reduce my stress level and gain something to keep sanity on the long run. So here it comes, in 2020 I want to:
- be patient
- become a better listener
- focus my attention
- be open to what comes next
While the past year made me acutely aware of my own limit it also made me more grateful for the people I have in my life and especially my husband without whose support I would not even have dared to take so many projects and who is the only one who manage to get me to take a deep breath when life gets too crazy.
If you have any tips on small steps to incorporate in my daily routine and help reach those goals, feel free to comment below.